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sherlockian100

Helping to bring the wife on board...help

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Ok, let me start by saying, my wife is on board with the idea of prepping. When I first started prepping about 5 years ago, she thought I was "just being silly." She has since come around from that perspective, and has seen the potential seriousness, and has even helped in building her own BOB. I started taking her camping and what not, to get her used to being away from the comforts of life. She enjoys it. I have planned a 3 day camping trip for this weekend and suggested we try to rough it a little more than she is used to (she does rough it a little more and more each time. So, I suggested teaching her how to use some of her prepped items, such as buliding a fire with her ferro rod and gathered tinder, actually purifying some water with tabs, to give her an idea of taste, etc. Not bringing groceries in a cooler, but rather sustaining the 3 days on MRE's and freeze dried, etc. She kind of turns her nose up to it. So, its like she is on board, as long as she is not inconvenienced. Has anyone else experienced this? What are some ideas to overcome it? Perhaps get her to want to try some of these things? Ideas to maybe make it more fun for her at first. I'm just scared that if that time comes where she is forced to do some of these things, even for a short time, she be completely culture shocked. If I can get her more used to it, perhaps not. Any ideas would be great.

 

Sherlockian

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There is another thread on here dealing with this...lol. I think we all have had our own issues with spouses and prepping. Some are truly lucky and complete partners in the endeavor. My wife "ignores" my preps and just basically goes with the flow. As for the MREs, I'd suggest only using it for a lunch meal the first time and slowly working to a 3 meal a day camp trip.

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Regulator. My situation is a little differrent than Stickhorse. My wife agrees that it is important, she agrees that the potential is there, does not think I'm being paranoid, she just seems to want me to worry about it for her. She kind of acts as if as long as I have it handled, all is good. And thats fine except, if it goes south, she will so far out of her comfort zone, she'll be shocked, so I just am looking for ways to get her to get more hands on. Thanks.

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Sounds like we are in same boat...lol. Is she into history? I use living history (medieval) for my step son. I do medieval and Colonial American/Mountain Man, so if you have an interest there, use it to get her to get more involved.

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Sounds like we are in same boat...lol. Is she into history? I use living history (medieval) for my step son. I do medieval and Colonial American/Mountain Man, so if you have an interest there, use it to get her to get more involved.

 

Actually not a bad idea at all. She is a school teacher....Thanks for the input and time.

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My wife is a lost cause at this point in the whole survival side of things, the only time I was able to get her involved was by appealing to her curiosity. By posing it as a question for her to brainstorm and try to figure out. "How would we get by away from civilization for a few days with just what we can carry?" I think was the way I posed the question. The ultimate result wasn't optimal, but I think the theory is sound.

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Good luck Sher. It can be a rough row to hoe. There is even alot of threads on here where Native Americans are discussed. Since I do not know your wife's interests, you can find the one that fits prepping and try to use that. It can actually add another layer of "fun" and may give you even more ideas on how to implement other tools/gear.

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MREs are sort of the back up for your back up. Learn how to cook real food with out any of the appliances in your kitchen and she will be impressed. Substitute powdered milk in for milk and a lot of baking recipes become an option. Get a dutch oven (car camping! Please don't lug this in a pack) and you should be able to cook any thing you can cook in a normal oven. Look up back packing recipes for more ideas on non spoiling foods. MREs were not meant to be eaten for months on end.

 

You can live off MRE's if you have to, but you really don't want to. Another option would be natural edibles, and hunting/fishing bounty. I recall impressing a young lady in high school with a stew made from foraged food stuff, better than dinner and a movie as it turned out ;)

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sherlockian,

several have made the point that MRE's are not optimal. I'll take it a bit farther. The suggestion of one meal isn't bad but I'm not sure I'd do it on a camping trip. Remember, moving out of the comfort zone is tough. That she's working with you is good. That she is willing to move into camping and learning is good. Do not destroy that good will! She is working with you and making progress; impatience on your part could have really bad results.

Bring some freeze dried food to try out so you guys can find what you like. Bring "real food" in case it is not an acceptable food. You're exposing her to the new food but not insisting she go cold turkey. In fact, you're asking her to help you find the best foods available for the two of you.

This is a slow road. You are making progress but it is not an OK, we're prepping now. It's little things, baby steps as it were. The old saw applies:

How do you eat an elephant?

On bite at a time.

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OK, I've got to pipe in here. The Capt. is so right!!!! You're trying to push a little too hard and she will most likely resist. How about, you have a fire making exercise in your yard?? that way, it's no big deal and you can make smores. do some sampling of the various freeze dried pouches so you jointly figure out what you would eat.

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Well we went on a two night camping and hiking trip. I stayed away (for this trip) from anything that she may find "yuky" I brought one meal of the freeze dried Mountain House meals, and ate "real food" the rest of the time. She actually liked the scrambled egg mauntain house, I got her into having fun building a fire utilizing a fire steel and the new Mora knife that I bought just for her, which she thought was really cool making fire w her new knife, and I made it easy on her "using a good fire gel (so I could guarantee success) fearing that if she failed her first time, she would get discouraged. I also took off on a hike and had her use our topo map/compass, to lead us back to camp. So, overall, she says she had a really good time and wants to go again next weekend....PROGRESS. Thanks for all the great advice. Now I have to figure out what to do on our next trip, as Capt Bart said, "Baby Steps."

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What kind of things is your wife into? This could give you an easier path to persuasion, especially if shes into something that could be useful in a survival situation, and she happens to be better at it than you are. As an example, my wife really loves to cook, and although she agrees with prepping in general, she's never been very proactive in planning. She is justifiably proud of her cooking skills, though.

 

So I worked out my 3 day meal plan for bugging out on foot (assuming our truck/bicycles are gone) and used Mountain House freeze dried foods as the basis for it. My wife is a vet like me, so she's had MREs before, but never any of the premium backpacking freeze-dried foods. I found a local retailer that carries a selection of them, and took my wife with me when I went to buy some. The idea was "I want to taste test these things before I count on them as my 3 day food supply. I'd like your opinion of how they taste, too, since I know you are a great cook, honey."

 

We bought the ice cream sandwich, granola w/blueberries, and the scrambled eggs w/green & red peppers. I wanted to start with the simplest flavored things first, and all of those are things she likes in 'normal' food. She loved the ice cream sandwich, and the granola blueberry one. She liked the fresh taste and appearance of the scrambled egg one, but told me it wasn't spicy enough (she's the Tabasco lover in our family). That was enough to get her interested in trying more of the MH meals, so we bought a bunch more and tried one a day for a week.

 

While we did that, I pointed out that if we get through the hurricane OK, we are going to need to be able to cook without electricity or running water. "I know you're a great cook honey, but are you going to be able to cook every day on a propane camp stove, or a gas grill like the old Weber my dad has? That's gonna be tough, I think."

 

She took that as a challenge of course, and has been building up a collection of 'camping cuisine' recipes. Instead of saying 'your little backpacking stove looks really cool, honey' now she says 'Jetboil? OK, show me how this works, and stand back while the chef experiments." Since then, she's come up with a few suggestions of her own about food, water, and hygiene in a post-hurricane situation...she's much more proactive with planning our prep now.

 

But now I gotta buy a new gas grill. (sigh) The expert in the family says the raggedy one we have just isn't going to cut it when SHTF.

Edited by survivalcyclist

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I happen to like MRE.Hubby says that there not what they used to be.IDK just that there not bad at all.I guess it's all on the matter of what kind you get.I like the Chili and Macaroni,Chicken Pesto Pasta,Chicken w/Salsa,and so on.I understand that most of these are i guess civilian MRE,but there good and don't cost that much.Better then fast food.:)

http://www.mreinfo.com/civilian/mre/sopakco-sure-pak-mres.html

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Guest survival101

Hey, Sherlockian. Hope you and your lady come together on this. Not knowing either of you, I am reluctant to bring this forward. But being both a woman, and a person (:D) oh, yeah, and an American (:D), I'm pretty familiar with the two concepts below.

 

When you said you wanted very much to make sure her first attempt at fire-making was a success, so you "ensured" it by using a good fire gel, it made me think of the concept of Learned Helplessness. This is a behavior in which a person allows themselves to appear and actually is convinced after a time that they are "helpless." It happens with children, women, the disabled, and the elderly in particular. Men are generally less susceptible because of their upbringing.

 

If your lady happens to be exhibiting learned helplessness, allowing you to handle things for her then you are not likely to succeed in teaching her survival skills. Key is to Encourage learning and responsibility. And not to take over her responsibilities for her. The reward for success is a good feeling for her, and basking in your pride as well. Not to mention being more likely to survive in a disaster. Now, THAT is a big reward.

 

Passive Resistance, on the other hand, is a behavior exhibited by many people of both sexes. They simply don't do something if they choose not to. They don't make a fuss, they don't try to change the rules, they simply don't participate. This can be as simple as saying to your spouse, you go ahead and do it, I'll be over here doing something else. In adults it's a lot more subtle. But, it's very similar to the behavior of a two year old who becomes rigid as a board or limp as spaghetti in response to being required to do something. Key here is to pique the subject person's interest. You do this by knowing what facet of the project would be most suited to their mind and ability. I think most of us who are long time married's can relate to this. If she takes an interest, she will become unstoppable.

 

Best of luck to you both.

Edited by survival101

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survival101 has a good point.Your better half will get excited about what she likes and let you do what she does not understand or want to do.

So wisdom and Capt Bart is Baby steps..Ask her what would help her enjoy it more????

plant some wild flowers and after a while she may want to go see how they are doing? and its a great trail marker for you..JMHO..

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survival101 has a good point.Your better half will get excited about what she likes and let you do what she does not understand or want to do.

So wisdom and Capt Bart is Baby steps..Ask her what would help her enjoy it more????

plant some wild flowers and after a while she may want to go see how they are doing? and its a great trail marker for you..JMHO..

 

Very good idea!

Very slick!:)

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Hey, Sherlockian. Hope you and your lady come together on this. Not knowing either of you, I am reluctant to bring this forward. But being both a woman, and a person (:D) oh, yeah, and an American (:D), I'm pretty familiar with the two concepts below.

 

When you said you wanted very much to make sure her first attempt at fire-making was a success, so you "ensured" it by using a good fire gel,

 

 

Best of luck to you both.

 

I hear what you're saying and I agree. And I wouldn't want to continue doing it, but I figured for the very first time, I didn't want her to discouraged by a failure. Next time, I might try say using a natural tinder, and if it fails, I can simply remind her she did it last tie and encourage her to keep trying. But as I said, for the first time, I didn't want a failure. Iknow her, she would get discouraged and just tell me to do it. But, your point is valid.

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survival101 has a good point.Your better half will get excited about what she likes and let you do what she does not understand or want to do.

So wisdom and Capt Bart is Baby steps..Ask her what would help her enjoy it more????

plant some wild flowers and after a while she may want to go see how they are doing? and its a great trail marker for you..JMHO..

 

Not bad Matt, but also helpful would be some onions, maybe some tubers, herbs or spices; anything edible that would help you, and others, as they walk the trails. I used to work with a guy who always planted onions because they did grow well by themselves and were useful on a hike.

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